Monday, October 1, 2012

UK tour merch + you


Hello! Presenting to you, our October 2012 merch collection.

It's all limited runs and we're not going to get them till the weekend, so we've put a bunch on big cartel to avoid disappointing those who come and want to buy new merch (or the 45923987235 other places in the world we're not playing)

 Buy now and, and we'll send them out by the 8th October. Please don't shout when we get to yours in two weeks time and we're out of your size. Click on what you like, or go here to browse round our store. We have a couple of red shirts and one white left, and other fun stuff too. BUT IT'S NOT NEW AND EXCITING LIKE THIS IS:::

all funds, as ever, get pumped into the Americanadian Dream.

I (ghost) JF Tote Bag, Silver on Black

over-size crest print shirt, black on blue softstyle

Octobering the Edges, A3 UK tour poster
K cool. That concludes today's presentation. Thank you for your continued support, see you soon!

xoxo

transatlanticism

hello!




On the eve of our UK tour, we'd like to do some announcery. actually i guess, part one of a two part announcery. This is the one that sets the scene, and you can expect plot exposition in a weeks time.




first, some more tour dates:

Johnny Foreigner Vs The Atlantic

OCTOBER
30th Satellite | Wilmington, NC w/ Hammer No More The Fingers

31st Pinhook | Durham, NC w/ Hammer No More The Fingers

NOVEMBER
1st - Republic | Richmond, VA w/ Hammer No More The Fingers

2nd - Velvet Lounge | Washington, DC w/ Hammer No More The Fingers

3rd - Golden West | Baltimore, MD w/ Hammer No More The Fingers

4th - The Fire | Philadelphia, PA w/ & Hop Along, The Sidekicks


6th - Glasslands Gallery | NYC, NY

7th - Great Scott | Boston, MA - Clicky Clicky Music Blog Show Spectacular

8th - TBA | Northampton, MA
9th - Binghampton University | Buffalo, NY

10th - TBA | Pittsburgh w/ Nervous Passenger
11th - TBA | Athens w/ Nervous Passenger
12th - TBA | Toledo w/ Nervous Passenger
13th - TBA | Kalamazoo w/ Nervous Passenger
14th - Sound Cellar | Chesterton, IN w/ Nervous Passenger
15th - JOHNNY FOREIGNER VS CHICAGO - w/ Water House, Nervous Passenger, My Dad @ Subterranean
16th - The Sett | Madison, WI w/ Nervous Passenger  
17th - JOHNNY FOREIGNER VS SWERP - Johnny Foreigner, Noumenon, Nervous Passenger, Scoundrel

!HOLY SHIT THATS AMERICA!

Well, some of it. The west coast, we're sorry, we just can't afford you yet. S'not like any offers have been beneath us, but airfare/backline/van, it's just out of our reach at the moment. If the last couple of weeks have taught us anything, it's not to base geography or distance on perceptions honed playing Turbo Outrun. It will happen at some point, we promise, but that doesn't mean we're not going to nag you all to ROAD TRIP over to see us.

We're hanging out with some awesome bands too; we're supporting Hammer No More The Fingers for a few shows, and be supported by Nervous Passenger at a few more.

Canada, You are happening too. We're going to be homeless tho so be gentle. Come back next week when we'll be adding shows and confirming the TBAs.

ANYWAYS RIGHT, none of this would have been possible without Swerp. What a great segue:





Secondly, we'd like to tell you about our new American label! Our second American label. Seriously right, in 2008 we sat in a boardroom high above Manhattan and signed contracts for provisional 9 month tour commitments to the same stable as Avril and Fallout Boy. In some alternate universe, our definitions of punk were alligned and at least one of us is married to Nickelback.

What really happened next is we met this guy J Matthew Nix. He was into our band and became our friend when he brought us coffee. We made each other videos, it was kinda like romance. The kind of romance where 18 months in one of you starts a party fuelled record label to promote bands you love and the other one is in a band looking for a label (but you also live in a different country)

That's happened to you before, right?

This kind of magic only happens in Chicago. Please take this as a formal transfer request from one twin city to the other. Swerp is pretty much our punka saviours helping out with our American tour, (which we hereby christen, Johnny Foreigner Vs the Atlantic) but we hope it leads to more adventures and better metaphors. Our first new Swerp release will be in partnership with Alcopop. and it will be called [better segue]

sweet




NAMES
magic-infused Herio Braker, 2d realm variant


Hello the world.

we would like to tell you about our new record / EP / badge set / tshirt / pretentious transatlantic art fag project.
and it is called NAMES.


We made it in the small hours of last week in our super secret Digbeth studio, with our long time producer Dominique James. It's our first recordings as a 4 piece, so it's totally appropriate that, as the first release with our Swerp, we now sound even more like all them American bands people say we sound like. If certain songs ended up as our Kieron Gillen style parable, and vs everything a Grant Morrison sprawl, then please let this be our Warren Ellis run.

NAMES will be available from the 27th October, (which is our last Vs London show) and you can buy from either label. They're the same but different.

There are four songs. one is for Swerp, one is for Alcopop, one will be communal and one we're literally going to give away for free next week like the net-savvy musicians we are.


So, in the UK, Alcopop will be releasing a fancy set of 6 38mm badges (pre order now!!), and in the US Swerp will be releasing a NAMES Tshirt hand coloured by us.

Each will come with a download code for their 3 songs. We'll be selling them on tour too, OBVS, and if you've had enough of us playing silly buggers with formats, you'll be able to dl the country-specific songs separately for £99.



Ok. SO, meet you back here next week with Canadian shows, new songs, and more details about the NAMES releases. Going on tour now, BYE

xoxo

Friday, September 21, 2012

always chances

Hello World, some brief things:

: Ebay people, thank you so very much. We have enough money to fake our americacanada tour on a secret backlot soundstage buy some plane tickets, this is totally looking like a Thing that can happen. If you haven't already, can you all please let us know if you'd like your winnings to be signed, and the mystery drums skin winners tell us how you'd like us to desecrate them. Stuff will be posted out on Monday

: -i worry- tshirt people, the shirts were hella delayed getting to us and most have been posted out, the rest are going out on Monday too.

- this guy here is called Herio Braker, and he's the magic guardian of our new recordings. He's been hanging out at our studio the last few days and we've been charging his sigil with the power of awesome loud guitar pop. You too can help us out here, look into his eyes, focus your happy thoughts on the sign he's holding, and he's spew those vibes over our new songs in the next week:


he can see you thru the screen because he is magic.



- also, we're going to make another shirt, for th UK tour. What colour should we use, we are awful at this. TELL US PLEASE.

- also also, recording makes for long hours late at night spent listening to each other play the same thing over and over again. so, one last favour, if you could all write your very bestest jokes in the comment box below, that would ease us thru the nights greatly.


thank youuuuuuu

xox

Wednesday, September 12, 2012

EXORCISM OF THE SELF

so, um americanada. hi there. as you may have seen leaked onto the interwebs, we have a few shows pencilled in for October. Truth be told, we have a decent run down the east coast and we're looking at practically at Canada and kinda more desperately optimistic at the west coast too. ITS LIKE ANOTHER COUNTRY COMPLETELY and finding shows that'll pay enough to justify flying over and paying for more backline hire is getting increasingly tricky. blerghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Anyway, (and this is where the rest of the world may start reading) all this dreaming is immaterial if we don't raise enough money to fly there in the first place, so here is todays super awesome news bomb.

presenting THE GREAT GET JOHNNY FOREIGNER TO AMERICANADA AUCTION 2012:

in which you guys get to buy awesome unique us - related artwork, and we then get to spend your money on plane tickets. this is definitely the best plan that ends with "we then spend your money on plane tickets" that you'll ever be involved in.

It's been kinda cool exorcising all this stuff to the internets. like old men who sell their war medals for cigarette money, only instead of cigarettes it's the holiday of their dreams, and they've already squeezed all the kudos and usefulness out of those medals anyway. and they also have perfect digital scans of them too. And noone is sad. This is a terrible metaphor.



What we're saying is we would rather live for the future (TOUR AMERICANADA) than accumulate scraps of memories designed for firing at other people in the first place. More news soon, but we've found an awesome US label that can sort us out with a van and someone to drive it and awesome bands to play with places to play and sleep and money to make more records, but only on the basis we can get out there in the first place.

So you guys, here is 2012's most Un-Kony crowd sourcing appeal. We've put up 16 different art packages from the last few years, all handmade unique original versions of things that ended up being record books, tshirts and things, as well as a couple of surprises. There's hopefully enough stuff to spread out so no-one has to pay OTT money, tho those with higher than average bank balances are encouraged to buy for other people as well as themselves.

1.) Grace and the Bigger Picture cover

2.) Grace and the Bigger Picture booklet pack (4 pieces) 1/5

3.) Grace and the Bigger Picture booklet pack (4 pieces) 2/5

4.) Grace and the Bigger Picture booklet pack (4 pieces) 3/5 (graces lyrics)

5.) Grace and the Bigger Picture booklet pack (4 pieces) 4/5

6.) Grace and the Bigger Picture booklet pack (4 pieces) 5/5

7.) Gin Dagger Cite her Bar Cut cover set (2 pieces)

8.) Feels Like Summer cover set (3 pieces)

9.) Criminals cover set (3 pieces)

10.) I Ghost JF Tshirt design

11.) Are You Hungry Now design (b&w)

12.) Ghost Vomit Eurotour design (b&w)

13.) South Africa tour poster

All the above are a4 photopaper sheets made by Lewes and are The Actual Ones Off Of The Record and whatnot.

13.) Arcs Across The City stage banner
a giant smelly heavy banner featuring (decayed) cover art



14.) Mystery snare skin (smaller than a floor tom skin)
15.) Mystery floor tom skin (bigger than a snare skin)

authentically toured and destroyed by junior, these found objects are waiting for YOU to tell us what to draw on them. if you win, that is. we specialise in fraudulent family crests. idk probably.

16.) look there are people like that out there and if we don't cater for them it's like we're dismissing their ability to function as part of the human race and since we're selling it anyway, we're not exactly high enough above them on the evolutionary scale to be proud about it anyway.

17.) kelly's pants. don't click that.

There spread across a couple of different accounts so treat this as a contents page, i guess.

So there you go, good luck and we hope that you all get what you want and the combined value of which puts america within practical distance. everything can be signed on request and if we're coming to your yard at any point on tour then you can pick it up. that may be quite a small chance, but we're announcing our UK dates in literally hours, so we'll throw in Guest list to any show for winning bids too.

Thanks for taking part anywayssss. This mass potential exchange of past for future is our friendly and less greedy homebrew version of kickstarter, and there's a fair chance it'll fail cos we weren't relentless or extortionate enough, but at the very least we'll be able to buy a big enough bowl to all cry in. forever.

xoxoxo



it is so a verb too.


TOURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR.

yo hello. this is one of those frantic weeks where we drop a lot of information. the most important is contained here - details of this little October road trip we've worked out, but first, here's a brief list of other things that are happening sooner but less relevant RIGHT THIS SECOND. I've been reading douglas copeland all week so am compelled to mess with the linear narrative. yes.

- we need to tell you how prospective americanada tour in november is shaping up
- we need to unveil the immense ebay auction that will hopefully fund said excursion. sidenote - this is what wil wheaton found in his garage. this is what we found in ours:

tempted?


- we need to tell you about our rad new american label and the awesome new songs coming to you via them and alcopop and we also need to record said songs.
-oh wow
- and you've heard this right?

ANYWAY, remember that time we used to not go on about america so much? ahh nostalgia. kidding; here is our comprehensively hyperlink'd UK tour for October. If there's anything we've missed then please send links and posters and we'll add to this. even you whose one bit of promotion seems to be a local press release reading "Birmingham trio return to      Birmingham".

awkward commiserations to those who live in places not near the below, i'm sure we'll be back round for you (apart from portsmouth). or you could always roadtrip?

All shows except Southampton, Birmingham and London are with this band we've been listening to so much our management are putting out their record (nb, it probably didn't happen like that BUT WE SO FOUND THEM FIRST) Playlounge are super fuzzy guitar pop and you can hear just enough of the words to make you think all the songs are about you, now, but they also have that early idlewild chordal sensibilty and them soaring william style chorus hooks and you start mouthing what you think are the words on the tube home after a 15 hour shift and then strangers start looking at you, and the giant paralympics access pass hanging off your belt, and tell their children not to point at you, and you know it's all kinds of wrong but at least they won't ask you to turn it down. uhhh i love this band right now. we can't wait for you to hear hem so we can remind you that we heard them first too.


DATA:

Thursday 27th September - Southampton - Avondale House - RPS Freshers Festival, free show! fb

Tuesday 2 October - Sheffield - The Harley - tickets - fb

Friday 5 October - Cardiff - Jealous Lovers Clubtickets - fb (with Greetings)

Saturday 6 October - Cheltenham - Walk The Line Festival  - tickets - fb

Monday 8th October - birminghasm - Glee Club  - (supporting Shonen Knife) - tickets 
                   

Wednesday 10 October - Leicester - Firebug - tickets

Thurs 11 October - Durham - Fishtank tickets - fb (with martha)
Friday 12 October - Hartlepool - The Studio - tickets - fb (with Antlez and GUNNING FOR MOTHERFUCKING TAMAR WOOO)

Saturday 13 October - Wakefield - The Hop - tickets (with PAWS and Wot Gorilla)

Wednesday 17th October - Edinburgh - The Electric Circus - tickets

Thursday 18th October - Aberdeen - The Tunnels 

Friday 19th October - Glasgow - Flat 0/1 - Oxjam event, cheap tickets

Saturday 20th October - Nottingham - Chameleon - tickets - fb (with Without Maps and Kappa Gamma

Saturday 27th October - VS LONDON 4 - tickets - (final Vs show, with awesome bands and masks and tbh halloween themed intrigue and fun. details sooner)
THANK YOU SEE YOU SOON! XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO

Thursday, August 30, 2012

JF vs America and Canada. AmeriCanada?

Hi blogosphere!
You spoke, we responded: as part of our Get Johnny Foreigner To America And Canada cause, we present to you our I WORRY Rotunda tee, for which we are now taking pre orders. It's here! HERE! All money raised by the sale of these, as mentioned, will take us closer to fulfilling our gig commitments as well as our dreams of returning to Americaland and Canadaland. For which we are so freaking excited, you have no idea.

We also recorded our Vs London III show (and then rerecorded the the cover we messed up): this will be sold as a bundle with the vs London III poster which can be found at the link above but hey for the sake of ease, here it is once more! >> oh hi again!. To those in attendance...Firstly, thank yoouuus. The mp3 of this, as promised, will be sent to you, for free. Just send us your ticket confirmation email to johnnyforeigner@hotmail.co.uk and we shall mp3 you right up.

Other updates and news to follow soon! Excitttteeeeeeeeddddddd.
so much love
Lex, Kel, Jun and Lewes xxxx